Love Is

Liberty

Emerging

This is a post I have been wanting to write for a very long time.

My son is finally emerging from his chrysalis.

I think that it is easy to judge and say that he is just now recovering because I see evidence of it, but the more likely reality is that it is has been happening all along, we just don't tend to believe something until we see it.

I cannot say for certain what the main catalyst has been, if there is one. We have done many things which I can list out, but in the end, Liberty's "becoming" is part of the Great Mystery.

We have a DAN! doctor. We have had him on various supplements. He has been on Diflucan for going on three months now to get rid of yeast. We know he had a bad yeast problem because the die-off symptoms were pretty bad, and because the cradle cap on his scalp is now finally resolving. I had no idea how long it takes to get rid of yeast.

We recently added spironolactone to reduce inflammation. I always start out giving my son a lower dose that what is prescribed simply because I don't know how he will react, and I can't take back something once I have given it to him.

Just about two weeks ago, we re-started therapeutic listening with a new occupational therapist who is the best he has ever had, and she started him on a different CD and has him do tasks to increase his focus and concentration.

In the last month, he has begun dressing himself, following commands, signing appropriately, beginning to say words, giving direct eye contact, and playing with age appropriate toys, engaging in pretend play, and is almost completely potty trained.

One month.

Last night, he became very angry with me when I told him he could not go outside at 8 PM - his bedtime. I showed him that it was night time and it was cold outside. This is Liberty's way of telling me that he needs to go to sleep. He loves to ride in the car, and I know that he thinks if he could just have a little ride before bedtime, he would fall asleep easily. It is also his way of fighting bedtime. He knows he is tired, but he just can't make himself get into bed.

After telling him no for the tenth time and signing no, I sat in the living room. He never took his eyes off of me, furrowed his brow, was clearly angry with me and got right up in my face. His look bored holes into my skull. I'm not kidding. Then, he tried to pinch my cheeks lightly, something he has never done, and made some kind of sound that let me know he was mad. I tapped his hands away from my face saying no, no that was not nice or some such thing, and his eyes widened in surprise, his mouth dropped open - clearly communicating to me his disbelief. "I cannot BELIEVE you won't get me what I want!" He never took his eyes off of me.

Now, I have to explain why this is a very big deal. Most of the time, Lib is looking somewhere else and he will just cry or fuss when I say no. But last night, Liberty's presence was unmistakable - it shown like a lamp around both of us. I was totally and completely stunned. He wound up kissing my face and hugging me and we walked together to his bedroom where he fell asleep almost immediately.

One month.

Perhaps part of his growth just kicked in, maybe something synapsed in his brain, a new connection made. Maybe the spironolactone did take some inflammation down.

I don't know. I will just keep doing what I do.

I asked the occupational therapist if she thought that Liberty was understanding more. She said she didn't know, that it did look like he was, but she said the bottom line was that she just acts as if he does and that I should, too.

This reminded me of the Pygmalion Effect; that is to say that expectation does influence outcome. I feel that if I hold positive expectation of what my son can do, it creates the space for him to be able to do it.

Let's just say there is a huge space around my son right now, open for miracles.

Voices of the Angels?

All I can say is turn up your speakers.

Exciting News....Why We Love Dr. Bock!

Dr. Bock has just launched his 4-A Healing Foundation. The website is still under construction, but the purpose of the foundation is to give grants to families to help pay for biomedical treatment, train doctors in the 4-A Healing Program that Dr. Bock uses, and to fund research for biomedical treatments for the 4-A disorders.

Here is the press release.

Here is the 4-A Healing Foundation website.

Vision

Monet Refuses the Operation

Doctor, you say that there are no haloes

around the street lights in Paris

and what I see is an aberration

caused by old age, an affliction.

I tell you it has taken me all my life

to arrive at the vision of gas lamps as angels,

to soften and blur and finally banish

the edges you regret I don't see,

to learn that the line I called the horizon

does not exist and sky and water,

so long apart, are the same state of being.

Fifty-four years before I could see

Rouen cathedral is built

of parallel shafts of sun,

and now you want to restore

my youthful errors: fixed

notions of top and bottom,

the illusion of three-dimensional space,

wisteria separate

from the bridge it covers.

What can I say to convince you

the Houses of Parliament dissolve

night after night to become

the fluid dream of the Thames?

I will not return to a universe

of objects that don't know each other,

as if islands were not the lost children

of one great continent. The world

is flux, and light becomes what it touches,

becomes water, lilies on water,

above and below water,

becomes lilac and mauve and yellow

and white and cerulean lamps,

small fists passing sunlight

so quickly to one another

that it would take long, streaming hair

inside my brush to catch it.

To paint the speed of light!

Our weighted shapes, these verticals,

burn to mix with air

and changes our bones, skin, clothes

to gases. Doctor,

if only you could see

how heaven pulls earth into its arms

and how infinitely the heart expands

to claim this world, blue vapor without end.

~ Lisel Mueller ~

(Sixty Years of American Poetry, The Academy of American Poets

Holding Pattern

We're still here. Liberty is doing well. We are going to try an anti-inflammatory next, spironolactone. Dr. Bock wanted him to be on Actos, a diabetic drug, but I was concerned about blood sugar levels.

Liberty was completely negative for PANDAS. We will re-test him again in a month if he still has OCD symptoms, but they seem to be lessening now. Even Dr. Bock said that you would be surprised how powerful therapeutic listening is, and so, we are watching Lib right now. The OT who oversees Liberty's listening program, thought that the symptoms we were attributing to PANDAS were actually side-effects of the listening program since Liberty had had a longer break than usual. I do remember the first break we took and he did a lot of side-looking and spinning. Then again, some symptoms could be attributed to the MB-12 shots that we started in January at the correct concentration.

Who knows? Watching and waiting, already turning our thoughts to summer camp and summer programs, and the good 'ole IEP coming up shortly.

Oh Joy.

The potty training is coming right along and he is dressing himself. This was not the case at all even three weeks ago!

Check out one of the supplements Dr. Bock is going to have Liberty try for inflammation.

It is called cercumin.

Fire Julie Gerberding of the CDC - Call the White House Monday

Below is Jenny McCarthy's letter posted on the Age of Autism. Go there to read the story with comments from readers.

03/07/2008
JENNY McCARTHY: JULIE GERBERDING MUST GO!
By Jenny McCarthy

I’m asking all parents and autism groups to join me in demanding Julie Gerberding’s immediate resignation as Director of the CDC.

On Monday, March 10th, beginning at 9:00am Eastern Daylight Time, let’s all start calling the White House and ask President Bush & Laura Bush to demand Julie Gerberding’s resignation for incompetence during the autism epidemic.

The White House switchboard can be reached at:
202-456-1414

Also, on the same day, please call your local Congressperson and Senators from your state and ask them to call for her resignation, too.

Julie Gerberding has led the CDC for 6 years during a time when the autism epidemic has only gotten worse. Despite tens of thousands of children who declined just like Hannah Poling, Ms. Gerberding stood before cameras yesterday defiant, cold, and defensive. Where is her humanity in the face of such tragedy? Why couldn’t she have said, “We at CDC want to make sure what happened to Hannah doesn’t happen to any other children, we want to make vaccines safe”?

Rather than listen to the heartbreaking stories of so many parents, you can be sure that Ms. Gerberding is spending her time right now trying to get the Spin Machine up and running to minimize, confuse, and deceive the American public.

The autism epidemic won’t end until we fix the vaccine schedule by reducing total vaccines, separating shots, waiting until our kids are older to begin shots, greening our vaccines, and screening for at-risk kids. Ms Gerberding has stood by and watched self-interested parties more than triple our vaccine schedule and I’m certain her inactivity to help our kids will continue.

The chances of Ms. Gerberding taking the radical steps to reform the CDC and reform our vaccine schedule to make it kid-safe are zero! We need a new CDC Director who is an open-minded reformer and who recognizes that we are experiencing an epidemic of autism, which Ms. Gerberding has never publicly admitted.

Please, parents and national autism organizations, let’s all help make our voices heard on Monday.


Thank you,

Jenny McCarthy


Jenny McCarthy is an actress, author and autism advocate

Bill Maher Anti-Pharma Rant

here

Thanks, Chris

I don't know if you caught Good Morning America today, but it was refreshing to say the least after Larry King's interview. Last night, it was as if the Polings had nothing to say.

This morning, however, Dr. Poling was very talkative. He spoke about the fact that thimerosol has been proven to cause mitochondrial disease. This is what the government has called Hannah's "pre-existing condition" which worsened with vaccines. I don't know who Dr. Zimmerman is, but Dr. Poling said they did research with his help.

He also stated that thimerosol was not taken out of the vaccines in 1999 as the CDC only recommended to do so and it was not mandatory. He stated that thimerosol was still in the vaccines through 2005. Of course, we know that thimerosol is still hanging around in the vaccines, but it was refreshing to finally here Dr. Poling and his wife say what they really felt and to be allowed to do so.

Mrs. Poling described her healthy daughter and the downward spiral of her health after the vaccines. She went into some detail about the symptoms displayed by her child. Why they did not speak out on Larry King is beyond me. It was a very strange show.

Anyway, I appreciate Good Morning America for airing the story this morning.

I need to let this all go today and move on. Everytime this issue raises its ugly head in the media, I get very depressed and angry all over again. Better to take my shot records and doctor notes to a lawyer and get on the list with all of the vaccine-injured kids instead of sitting around fuming every time this issues presents itself.

A Million or More of Hush Money?

Larry King Live tonight was dismal. There was the lawyer sitting next to the parents who basically said that they don't know what caused their child's autism, maybe it was the vaccines, but they thought people should still get get their children vaccinated. No mention by them of safe schedules, no mention by them of taking the crap out of the vaccines, no mention of ...anything. They seemed kind of drugged to me, almost as if they had nothing to say. And, that makes me suspicious.

They are interviewing the wrong doctors. The general public who has no association with any loved one with autism still has no idea what is really going on. Where is Dr. Bradstreet who has testified countless times in court. I know of one case where he did a spinal tap and the Measles virus was found. Where did they dig up these other doctors besides Gupta? Where is the DAN! point of view? The doctor who apparently believed in a link between vaccines and autism, really did not have much to say, either. In fact, he and the Polings themselves acted like they had undergone lobotomies right before the show aired.

I expected something radical, groundbreaking. This was just more of the same old tired statements. Same shit, different day.

Obviously the national media does not report what is really going on, and are hurting rather helping the autism community. I remember why I turned my TV off. I only tune in when other people call me and tell me something regarding vaccines or autism is going to be on. I think I will stop doing that. I need to preserve my energy for the care of my son. I have been bomarded with enough negative energy to last a lifetime.

Always when I spout off about the extra crap (antifreeze, MSG, etc.) that is now in the vaccines, people say they got vaccines when they were children and they turned out okay. This really burns me up because we know that the CDC has increased the amount of vaccines they give to a child, with the intention of helping the child. Why aren't the children who DIE within days of vaccines in the news? Did you know that the CDC calls these deaths SIDS-related?

Why don't we have the information placed side by side whenever someone brings up this issue. We have a list of current vaccination schedules and ingredients. Where are the ones from the other years? Why was that not presented? It never is. That is information I would want to know if I was a parent trying to make a decision about vaccines. Give me some facts, not that same pat answer by the CDC about studies showing there is no link.

Screw the studies and look at all of these kids! Something is terribly WRONG. Autism is an EPIDEMIC of untold proportions. It is becoming like AIDS which was ignored and discounted for years. I don't buy into the gene theory. There are too many children being diagnosed for genes to mutate that fast. This is environmentally related.

And, here we go again, allowing erroneous information to be broadcast by the media; that thimerosol has been taken out of the vaccines. It is not true. Just go on over to The Age of Autism and read up. No one apparently is overseeing the thimerosol amounts in the vaccines. It is put in and supposedly taken out...yet who oversees controls that? Do they know how much is left? The FDA says they don't. The CDC says they don't.

Doesn't it also seem counterintuitive to look at the all of the viruses being injected into a four-month old baby and think it's okay? The Poling's child had 9 injections in one day.

I can only hope we elect a president who will get something done about this and even then who knows how long it will take. Research should have been started a long time ago.

And, this crap about not being able to go to court after three years?

We need 1,000 Jenny McCarthys.

I'm just sick of the whole issue.

Vaccination Court Trial on Larry King Live

The child who suffered a regressive encephelopthy after her immunization will be on Larry King Live tonight. Check your local listings.

Here is the press release regarding this.

BREAKING NEWS
Landmark Federal Court Concession That Local Child From Atlanta Developed Autism From Vaccines

Child joins parents in press conference about this historic result at Atlanta Federal Court House tomorrow.

Local couple from Atlanta will join with their 9 year old daughter, Hannah, in a press conference discussing their daughter's development of autism as a result of vaccines. This landmark case alleged that autism was caused by childhood vaccines and was scheduled to be heard as a test case before the concession was made.

The press conference will be held tomorrow, Thursday, March 6, 2008 at 11:30 am on the steps of U.S. Federal courthouse at 75 Spring Street in Atlanta, Georgia.

The Centers For Disease Control have estimated that 1 in 166 children have autism, and many have linked the autism epidemic in this country to the mercury based preservative used in childhood vaccines.

Media: Contact Todd Scott 12-564-4692, 516-312-6573 cell Note: “Evidence of Harm” author and journalist David Kirby is available to comment on this breaking news: 718-230-4250 – www.evidenceofharm.


Also, if you want to read about more details of that case, here is the link:

MEDIA Autism Payout Reignites Vaccine Controversy
http://www.newscientist.com/article/mg19726464.100-autism-payout-reignites-vaccine-controversy.html

Children's Deaths - Vaccine Related?

The highlighted areas are all my emphasis. How can you inject so many viruses in a 4-month old infant? I feel lucky to even have my child still with me.

Spokane

Shot in the dark
Heartbroken woman wonders if vaccines killed her infant son

By JoNel Aleccia Staff writer December 23, 2007

Federal health officials are reviewing whether routine immunizations contributed to the deaths of as many as three North Idaho babies this fall, a spokesman for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention said this week. The agency has requested autopsy reports and medical records for at least two children and could seek them for a third Kootenai County infant, all of whom died in September and October, apparently within days of receiving recommended vaccines. There's no clear link between the vaccines and the deaths, which were classified as Sudden Infant Death Syndrome, or SIDS, said Curtis Allen, a spokesman for the CDC. "There is nothing so far to indicate that there is a particular problem other than these children died in the same city," Allen said. But the mother of one of the children said it's no coincidence that her 4-month-old son died within days of receiving injections to prevent serious childhood illnesses, including diphtheria, tetanus, pertussis, hepatitis B, polio, rotavirus and invasive pneumococcal disease.

"My baby was so healthy," said Shelly Walker, 39,of Hayden. "He was extremely full of life, energy and vitality." Nevertheless, early on the morning of Sept. 15, less than three days after Vance Vernon Walker received a round of vaccines at Lakeside Pediatric and Adolescent Medicine in Coeur d'Alene, his mother awoke to a nightmare.

"It was about 5:15 a.m. I woke up and thought, "He's not making any noise!" Walker recalled. "I went to pick him up and then I screamed." Her 16 1/2-pound boy was warm and his lips were still pink, but he wasn't moving. Blood was crusted beneath his eyes, and his clothes and toys were covered with a bloody froth. As her husband, Brian, 46, called 911, Walker worked frantically to resuscitate their child. But in the emergency room at Kootenai Medical Center, doctors said Vance had been dead for several hours.

"I grabbed my baby in my arms and held him up and I screamed, 'How in the hell did this happen?' "Walker said. "Was it the vaccines?"

Medical officials from the CDC and the federal Food and Drug Administration are working to answer that question for the Walkers and for families of two other babies who died within six weeks of each other. Two of the deaths have been logged in the voluntary Vaccine Adverse Event Reporting System–VAERS – jointly operated by the CDC and FDA, agency officials said. But Dr. Robert West, the Kootenai County coroner, confirmed that three infants died this fall within days of immunization. Parents of the other babies could not be reached for comment.

Autopsies failed to detect any specific vaccine reactions, West said, forcing a determination of SIDS– a "diagnosis of exclusion," he noted. He said he welcomes the federal review. "It is a little bit unusual but not totally unheard of," West said. "It deserves the investigative clout of the CDC."

Walker confirmed that her son's death was one of the Idaho cases reported to VAERS. The other reported child likely was also under the care of the Coeur d'Alene pediatric group, Allen said. That raises the possibility the children received vaccines from the same batch. If the CDC receives three reports of deaths or 10 reports of serious non-fatal injuries related to the same lot of a vaccine, it launches a review, Allensaid. In Vance Walker's case, the immunizations included a dose of Pediarix, a combined vaccine that contains DTaP, hepatitis B and inactivated polio vaccines. His mother's records indicate the lot number of the vaccine manufactured by GlaxoSmithKline was AC21B124B. He also received a dose of Prevnar, lot numberB54007C, a vaccine manufactured by Wyeth Pharmaceuticals. Allen, of the CDC, said it would be up to the medical practice to decide whether to suspend use of the vaccine. Dr. Brian Hickok, the pediatrician forWalker's son, did not return calls about the issue. A representative for the medical practice declined to comment.

Those two vaccines are the most likely to be implicated in any adverse events, said David Terzian,a Virginia lawyer who specializes in vaccine injury cases. Terzian said the Walkers have a good chance of receiving compensation for their son's death through a federal program because it occurred so soon after immunization, well within the 72 hours required by federal rules. Information provided by drug manufacturers and attached to the vaccines reports low numbers of associated deaths. In 14 clinical trials of Pediarix, five deaths were reported among 8,088 recipients ofthe vaccine, including two cases of SIDS. In a study of more than 34,000 children in which about half received Prevnar and half received a control vaccine, a dozen deaths, including five SIDS deaths, occurred in the Prevnar group. By contrast, 21 deaths occurred in the control group, including four SIDS deaths, according to manufacturer data. Immunization specialists acknowledge that any death following vaccination is a tragedy. But they emphasize that far more children died or fell ill in the era before vaccinations." (COP-OUT!!) For the most part, disease is always going to be more risky than getting a vaccine," said Nicole Pender, health educator for the immunization program at the Washington state Department of Health.

That is no comfort to Shelly Walker. She hopes her experience inspires parents to educate themselves about the risks of vaccines and prompts them to monitor any reaction, however slight. She plans to file a claim through the National Vaccine Injury Compensation Program, which provides a maximum of $250,000 after a vaccine-related death. In return, all records related to her son's injury and death will be sealed by the drug manufacturers. Walker is optimistic that they'll use the data to improve product safety so other families won't experience her tragedy."My hope is they're compiling data and statistics to make things better," she said. "I'm trying to believe in the inherent goodness of something here."

David Waddel Died Sept. 4, 2007
Vance Walker Died Sept. 15, 2007
Paiytu Ames Died Oct. 10, 2007

All from the same pediatricians office. YET IT'S UP TO THE PRACTICE WHETHER TO SUSPEND USE OF THE VACCINE OR NOT?!!!