No order of difficulties in miracles

Well, the dreaded IEP meeting turned out to be the best yet! Each year, I begin to get knots in my stomach as the day approaches that I have to go to Lib's school, get a visitor's pass and trek down the long and winding hallways to the meeting room, where I have to listen to teachers and therapists report on my son, and it's usually about how they can't find anything to motivate him, how he is inconsistent in his responses, or he is not picking up signs, etc. Usually, I come away depressed for a day at least and have to come home and process all of the new tasks I am to put into place. Process. Adjust. Assimilate. Move on.

This time, it was different. Everyone around that round table sung my son's praises. I barely had to say anything. My son's teacher had everything written out almost verbatim as to what I told her I wanted to see happen from this point on. For the first time since Libby was tiny, we all agreed to ditch the signs he never took to anyway, and employ all methods of working with pictures. We came up with all kinds of great ideas. And, I was thanked for all I do for my son! In addition, everything I want for him was already spelled out in detail in some beautifully written goals by his teacher.

It was so enjoyable for me and my sister to sit back and hear about all of the wonderful things my son is doing. I especially loved it when the OT would smile and say, "and he wasn't even doing that last year!" And, also the speech therapist put aside her usual sparring energy and was so positive about all of the things Lib is beginning to do. I kept saying,"Oh, I didn't know that!" And I'd get smiles all around. Wow.

Lib is responding to pictures and has said a few words. He is becoming even more social and engagable. He is now getting very interested in books and...drum roll here...the spoken word, like having stories read to him! And, here comes autism camp this summer where he will have a teacher to do one-on-one with him for 6 weeks from 9 to 3, four days a week.

I think this has all happened too because, first of all, Liberty has a fantastic teacher. She is BCBA certified and she has lots of years of experience. She loves what she does. She has a routine in place for my child that has yielded almost miraculous results. And, most importantly, she and I talk every day. We have the communication sheet sent home that tells about his day, but she is accessible by phone and email, and we keep in very close touch about what we are each doing so we are on the same page.

Also, nothing that Lib does is a "little" thing in our world. If Lib ate apples, then I get an email in capital letters or a phone call. The day he waved hi to her and hung up his backpack, I got an excited phone call from her. The day he followed verbal commands, used the potty, imitated a gesture, etc. - all of these things are milestones for Lib.

If anything, Liberty has taught me to take nothing for granted. We celebrate the so-called small things. Raising him has caused me to appreciate more and more of my world. It's so true that you don't know what you have until it's gone or altered in some way. The fact that appreciation is more of a reflexive reaction for me now than cynicism is miraculous.

My little boy is such a trooper. And, here he is: Eating well, toileting himself, wanting to play with other kids, initiating games with us...being in the world. In some ways, I just think it is taking him longer to grow up. The speech is obviously concerning, but everything that is considered pre-speech is in place now. And, we have a great doctor. In just 2 short weeks, Liberty has changed his diet and learned to eat 5 different fruits, fill his cheeks with chicken nuggets, and a variety of other foods I have managed to make gluten/casein/MSG/yeast and sugar free! Miraculous! The quality of his food has increased. I joke about how I just put food in his lunch box and send it to school and the teacher miraculously gets him to eat it, and then I can't wait until the lunch box comes back empty and then I just sit and smile.

I had felt so bad about this last year as being his "lost" year, i.e....screwing around with the doctor in NY and the phone appointments and having to start all over again with another doctor, the fact that no one would listen to me at the IEP last year when I said we needed to add in pictures. It took an entire year for the school folks to figure out that Lib doesn't take to signs and it took me a whole year to ditch a doctor who was not helping us and charging us a fortune.

BUT, I realize that the year was not really "lost." Lib obviously advanced a lot with this teacher he had, and somehow we found our new DAN doctor who wasn't even here a year ago. It's only my perception of the year being lost, of wasting time that colors everything. What do I know? Perhaps there are many changes going on all of the time that I just don't see, and would take for granted if Liberty had not received his diagnosis of ASD.

I feel good today that we are least moving in the right direction, that my little boy has what he needs and then some! His teacher is going to be coming to our house one day a week (camp is only 4 days a week) for two hours and working with him and pictures this summer.

I just could not ask for more. There truly is magic afoot!