It takes a village

Liberty had his six month dental appointment yesterday for a check and a cleaning. I remember how much I hated going to the dentist when I was a kid but, though it may sound odd, I always look forward to going to Liberty's dentist.

First of all, he is a pediatric dentist. Second of all, he has family members with children with autism, either Asperger's or severe autism or brain injury. He is always warm and cordial to me, and asks questions that let me know that he is "in the know" about autism. He asks me how I'm doing and he really means it. Kids love the atmosphere (adults, too). The walls are filled with over-sized paintings of Dr. Seuss characters. In the center of the waiting room, there is a long table with a Lego base on it. All the kids line up around the table and stack and unstack buckets of Legos in various shapes and sizes.

The staff is unbelievably kind. It takes a "team" to clean Lib's teeth. It's scary for any child to have metal instruments placed in their mouths, not to mention the discomfort of the vibrating mechanical tool used to polish teeth. And, they used a little instrument to keep his mouth open yesterday. He cried, but he was okay. Four voices were soothing him in unison. I have to kind of throw my body over his legs. He kicks his shoes off. His strength surprises me every time. I'm always exhausted afterward, like I've been roping cattle. Even so, this time, Lib was not hysterical or anything, just annoyed and a little frightened.

One of the staff that was helping us hold Lib on the dentist's table told me that no other dentist in town will see any child who cannot lie down and be still! That means, all of the children with special needs come here to this place. It breaks my heart.

I was reminded of how much help I need from others to raise my son. The dentist, the doctor, the hair cutter, the teachers, the therapists, the neighbors, a decent understanding phlebotomist at the lab, et cetera.

The village of Those Who Understand. The Compassionate. The Competent.

When the cleaning by the hygienist was over, the dentist came in to examine Lib's teeth. They are growing in straight, taking after his father thank God, and no cavities. According to the dentist, "Perfect." A word that is music to my ears.

After they were done, Lib got up off the table, high-fived the dentist, and, smiling, ran out into the waiting room and sat down beside the other children at the table to play. No grabbing Legos from other children, no shoving, no yelling.

Lib is coming along in his own time, but Dr. Stu Bonnin made this whole experience not only possible but more than bearable. I absolutely love him, and, he remains, at the top of my gratitude list.