In the 'Hood

Liberty is doing great in camp. His teacher is ecstatic about his progress. I don't understand everything they do, but they are following instructions and methods from the Carbonne Clinic. They take a lot of data each day which I am hoping I can take to Liberty's school this year.

Yesterday, I was told that Liberty retained everything he had learned the previous week which was about 15 things that include matching skills and imitation. Also, when I went to pick him up from camp, there he was riding the big trike down the hall to me, steering. He's been on his bike before and pedaled a little, but would never steer. This teacher said he circled the halls yesterday three times by himself with no help.

I noticed that when we are in the pool his coordination is getting better, too. He has more of a sense of where he is in space and I think he will actually be able to swim one day. I found a swim instructor for children with special needs so I am hoping to line some lessons up when camp is out. They seem very cool and have a swim team for special needs kids called Sea Stars.

What I have found this summer is that Liberty is capable of much more than I ever dreamed possible. Sometimes it makes me feel inadequate at home, but let's face it, I cannot give one-on-one at home for eight hours straight unless I dropped the rest of the responsibilities from my life. It has crossed our minds before, trust me, that perhaps I would be the best teacher for Liberty. But, I think I might have found someone who actually lives in my little town who can help me create a good home program for Liberty. Finally. Ironically, it took a blogger friend who lives in NY to hook me up with a woman in this teeny town in FL where we live! Turns out she was in my son's class the first week of camp but had to drop out because of some pregnancy complications. How small is this world, I ask you?

I have been too critical now, I feel, of our school system. I see Liberty's particular school in a new light, realizing that most children don't get the one-on-one instruction that he received last year, that verbal behavior really is probably the best route for him right now and not just using PECS. Camp has made me appreciate the school I was getting disgusted with, imagine that! I have learned not to judge so quickly or harshly just because I am frustrated. It takes time for the teachers to get to know the kids, too.

So, I have surrendered to the Universe and am allowing the right people, places, and situations to que up for us now. Truly, anxiety blocks these things and colors my perception. I've just been so darn scared that somehow I've done all of the wrong things, or it's too late, or a million other fears that rise up from the Pandora's Box otherwise known as "What's Going on with Liberty?"

This morning I awoke thinking that I want a whole new day. I want a whole new way of thinking. What if I were to drop the anxiety and the painful story just for today? What if I just focus on all of the things going right for today? There are so many.

I just recently found out that a doctor in my neighborhood who is a developmental pediatrician just got DAN certified. Okay, I'm whispering so there won't be a mob at her door. She happens to partner with another doctor I would want to be MY doctor who runs a really cool alternative health clinic and day spa. In this little town, in my own backyard.

Next week, we are going to take Liberty in for a repeat EEG because we are seeing more and more episodes that look like absence seizures. I hate putting him and us through this, but it is necessary and we will get to see the new neurologist who is so cool. I read his book, by the way. He worked with Mother Theresa and traveled through the Amazon rain forest by himself. What a story. He's in my neighborhood.

And, I've still got the big guy, Dr. Bock, in NY who is not taking any more patients for a long time in our support group.

Perhaps I really am drawing all of this to me, as my sister says I am, through my Love for Liberty and the unwavering search for the best help. Now, if I can just do it gracefully, sans anxiety.

Don't they call that Trust?